


Mr. Sandman

by Caitybug



Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: Angst, But he gets hurt here, COC Day 4, Carry On Countdown (Simon Snow), Dreams, I love Simon Snow I swear, I'm so sorry, Inspo is from an ep of the OG Charmed series, M/M, but they kiss, some light depictions of violence I guess, some trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-28
Updated: 2019-11-28
Packaged: 2021-02-25 20:33:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,708
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21591523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Caitybug/pseuds/Caitybug
Summary: Simon gets put under a dream spell and the only way that Baz thinks he can get him to wake up from his nightmare is to enter his dream.The Mage is a dick (duh), Baz and Simon love each other, and they kiss.Part of the Carry On Countdown- Day 4 Dreams (2019)
Relationships: Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch/Simon Snow
Kudos: 96





	Mr. Sandman

**Baz**

Simon has been out on some stupid mission by the Mage. He was called from class earlier today and immediately followed his stupid mentor. I can't help but be irritated by Snow's puppy-dog like loyalty to such a complete idiot. If I look on the bright side, maybe him being gone could mean that I finally have a moment's rest from the resident golden boy. I won't have to look at his stupid bronze curls, his glowing skin scattered with freckles and moles, and the constant reminder of just how  _ alive _ Simon Snow is. 

Or, at least that is what I thought it may be like. Instead, I find myself stressing for the rest of the day about what he could possibly be doing. Who was the Mage bringing him to fight this time? How hurt would he be when he returned? And, of course, the question I never let creep into my thoughts (yet somehow always does)-  _ will he return this time _ ?

I didn’t have to stress long, however, as Simon fucking Snow is lying in his bed when I return from the classes. He is sleeping soundlessly in his bed, the window swung wide open, despite it being November and  _ freezing _ . 

_ Good job stressing yourself out Pitch.  _ I think to myself. All-day I felt sick, panicked about what state I would find him in, if I found him at all. Much to my relief, he seems relatively unharmed. Maybe there wasn’t a mission after all. 

**Simon**

I didn’t know what was happening when the Mage called me from class. He had asked me to meet him up in my room and that we would discuss the mission from there. I don’t mind helping him, but I can’t help but be completely frustrated at the way that he disregards me all summer, only to pull me to his beck and call when he finds me to be useful. 

Despite this, I know that I have to go. I feel a strong sense of loyalty towards him since he saved me from the care homes. Maybe I shouldn’t feel this way after everything, but I feel strongly indebted to him. 

“Ah Simon, there you are.” The Mage says, a bright smile on his face as I enter the room. “I trust things are well.” 

I can’t help but notice that he doesn’t  _ ask _ how I am doing, but merely states it. The Mage doesn’t often ask me anything that has to do with my wellbeing, only ever my magic. As much as I try to pretend he does, I know he doesn’t truly care about me. I’m a power source, a means to an end, his weapon in this war. 

“You needed to see me, sir?” I ask, curious as to what we are going to do today. Is it to fight more goblins? I could handle them at least. Maybe that would mean I could be back in time for dinner at least. 

“Yes, Simon.” He drops his smile and furrows his brow. “It isn’t a secret that your magic isn’t so easily controlled or handled by you. I want to help you with that.”

“Oh.” I guess I should have guessed that he was going to be here about my magic. He usually, just expresses disappointment in my ability to control my magic, and doesn’t give me much advice on how to control it. 

“I have a spell, but it’ll put you in a dream state. I’m going to have to enter your dream and hopefully, we can figure it out in your unconscious.” He steps forward pulling out his wand as he does so. Suddenly I don’t feel comfortable with what he is suggesting. 

“Excuse me, sir?” I take a step back. 

“Please, Simon.” he says “This will be easier if you cooperate.” 

I’ve never not listened to his orders, but I don’t like the look on his face. His eyes look dark and his free hand is at a fist at his side. I feel my magic start to spike around me at my panic, so I back away from him further until I feel my hand brush the door handle. This one move gives me the confidence I need to rush out the door. 

I barely get out the door when my world goes black and I feel my body fall into a dream state. 

**Baz**

I get out of the bathroom and I hear Snow start to sniffle from his bed. We both suffer from nightmares, so it isn’t unusual for at least one of us to be wrestling with demons while asleep. My only hope is that it ends soon for him, and I crawl into bed, turning to watch him sleep. 

It’s then that I hear him start to quietly plead  _ no _ . 

The first time he utters the word I am sitting up in bed, but then he continues at a rapid pace- and I can see tears streaming down his face. Almost without thought I am up and at his side, frantically trying to figure out what to do. 

He begins to toss and turn, and it’s obvious that he needs to wake up. I can’t stand watching him like this, to suffer from whatever is happening in his dream. For a brief moment I wonder if he is having a nightmare involving  _ me _ . 

“Snow,” I say softly, hoping it is enough. “Snow it is just a dream, you need to wake up.” I shake his shoulder slightly, hoping that it will wake him up. He begins to whimper instead and frustratingly enough remains  _ asleep _ . 

I try everything after that, from shouting, shaking harder, even picking him up and moving him to my bed. Somehow he stays asleep all the same. I scratch my head and pace around the room. It’s so hard to think when I keep hearing him cry out. 

_ Why won’t you wake the fuck up? _

It’s at this that I make one of the most irrational choices I’ve made in my undead life- I decide that if I can’t wake Snow up from his dream to help him- I’ll just have to meet him halfway and go into his dream. 

**Simon**

I open my eyes, and at first, I don’t know where I am. My eyes adjust quickly to my surroundings, and I realize I’m back in one of the care homes- the last care home I was in before I started at Watford to be exact. Did the Mage bring me back here? How is this going to help me control my magic better? 

“Hello?” I shout in an attempt to make contact with anyone else. 

When there is no response I start to walk around. The building looks the same as when I last left it. There aren’t any decorations- the walls are stark white, with white tiled floors. As I make my way up the first flight of stairs I hear voices. 

_ Finally,  _ I think.  _ Maybe now I will get some answers _ . The Mage has to be here somewhere. 

The hallway in front of me stretches for what seems like forever. I don’t remember it seeming so long when I lived here so many years ago, but maybe I just don’t remember it well enough. 

I begin to make my way down when I hear the voices again through a door to my left. I walk to it and push open the door, only to immediately slam it closed again- panting heavily and shaking my head of what just happened. I can’t have just seen what I thought I just saw. My heart is about to explode from my chest, and I reach back to the door to face what is happening in that room. 

The room in front of me is bursting into flames. I see the faces of so many boys that lived in this house with me at the time when my magic first came to me. However, instead of seeing their faces with their usual array of emotions, I see them being burned. They’re screaming out in pain, and I’m not sure what I can do, so I run forward to try to do something,  _ anything  _ when I feel a hand wrap around my wrist. 

I turn to face whoever it is, and I see him. The Mage. He is shaking his head at me and pulling me back out and closing the door behind me. I start to push away from him to go try to save the people in that room, they don’t deserve to die. 

“Sir,” I start, my voice shaking a bit. At this moment I realize there are tears going down my face. “Please, I need to do something. Help me save them.”

“There is no saving them Simon.” The Mage spits. “Besides, this is a dream. It is only showing you what you need to see.”

“What does that mean?” I almost whisper, processing what he is saying. A dream? So the boys in that room are fine, right? Why would I have something like that in a dream?

“This is what we are looking at, Simon. We are trying to find the root of what is wrong with how you control your magic, and try to find a way for you to control it better in the future. It seems that you just found a bit of your past, some of the hurt you've caused.”

“But- but sir?” I stutter “I-I thought that the home was unharmed when I had left it. I thought none of the people inside were hurt by my magic.”

The Mage turned to me at this, looking at me as if I were eleven years old again. Naive, young, and clueless of the world around me. 

“How would you have reacted if you had known at eleven that everyone had died when you lost control of your magic?” The Mage raised his eyebrow at me, waiting for his words to sink in. I hate that I thought of Baz immediately. Maybe Baz was right all those years- I really am the worst chosen one ever. I can’t believe I hurt all those people, and caused them pain. They didn’t deserve to die or suffer because of me. What lives would they have led if I hadn’t gone off? If maybe I didn’t have the amount of uncontrollable magic that runs through me. 

It takes me a moment to realize that the Mage has walked away, and I suppose I should follow him. If he is really going to help me with my magic then I need to stay with him. I can’t risk anyone else getting hurt just because of my stupid magic. 

***

We pass several other rooms in silence before the Mage opens another door to me. I take a deep breath before entering, bracing myself for what could be coming next. 

**Baz**

When I open my eyes again I am greeted with a vision of a white popcorn painted ceiling with a dust-covered ceiling fan slowly spinning over me. I’m definitely not in our room anymore, so my spell must have worked. 

Standing up I am able to gain more awareness of my surroundings. The walls are boring, the carpet is stained, and there is a plexiglass window revealing the front desk by the front entrance. Where is Snow at in his dream? No wonder he is having a nightmare, this isn’t exactly the place of pleasant dreams. 

“PLEASE STOP” I hear up the stairs and I start to run. I could recognize that voice anywhere, especially since I’ve been listening to that exact voice scream in our room tonight. 

It doesn’t take me long before I am up the stairs and running down the seemingly endless hallway at the top of it. I strain my ears to listen to him, thankful, for once, to be a vampire. It takes a moment but I hear his whimper and continue to run. 

It takes me too long to find him, seated outside of a room, head in his hands, sobbing. I’ve never seen him look so small and defeated. Simon Snow has always gotten back up, he has always fought to the end. Not now though, this Simon Snow had been defeated by whatever was going on in his dream. 

I try to approach him slowly and softly, not wanting to startle him. 

“Simon,” I say softly, reaching a hand out to his arm. This makes him jump back and cry out again. 

“Oh no, not you, please, no.” He looks scared as he begs. I try not to be hurt by this. In his head, I am his enemy, so I am sure that right now I am the last thing he wants to see. 

“Shh,” I say again, sitting down on the floor to be more on his level. “It’s okay, I’m just here to help you. You’re stuck in a bad dream and you won’t wake up- I’m here to try to help you wake up.”

“The Mage.” He sobs out “He’s trying to help me. Says that by going through these I can learn more about my mag-magic and c-control it.” He starts stuttering more through his tears. I try not to let it show, but my anger spikes at this. Obviously Simon thinks the Mage is trying to help him, but I don’t know who would consider what Snow is going through currently to be called help. 

“What do you mean by learning more?” I ask, instead of saying all the other thoughts in my head. 

“I’m still figuring that out. He just had to leave to do something. T-told me to continue going into rooms.” He pauses to wipe a tear off his cheek. I wish I could reach forward and wipe it for him, but I’m trying to remain a safe distance- he is obviously in a sensitive place right now. “B-but all I keep doing is watching those I care about get hurt by my magic.” It’s at this that he looks back up at me again. “I don’t want to hurt you too Baz. You should leave. I know this is a dream- so you’re not real- but I don’t want to hurt you.”

My breath catches. Did Snow just say what I think he said? We are enemies- he is supposed to want to hurt me. I’ve given him plenty of reasons to do so. 

Before I can think too much on that I move closer to him and wrap my arms around him. He flinches but allows me to do so, burying his face in my chest. 

“I don’t want to hurt you either, Snow,” I say softly, starting to run my fingers through his hair. “So how about we try to wake you up and you can leave this dreadful place?”

He shakes his head and looks up at me with his big blue eyes sparkling with tears that continue to rush down his cheeks. “B-but the Mage. I need to control my magic, he’s going to help me. I can’t hurt any more people, Baz.”

“Fuck the Mage.” I can’t help the snarl that forms on my face as I say that. “You always protect those around you, even when your magic becomes uncontrollable. It’s one of your better traits.”

“It’s all a lie, Baz.” He sighs and then pushes off me, starting to stand. “I thought I was protecting people, but I’m not. I’m just hurting them more.”

I open my mouth to argue, but someone comes forward. 

“Oh look, another visitor.” The Mage states, a smirk forming on his face. 

I look over to Simon and his face is looking down at his feet, tears still falling down his cheeks as he walks forward. As he approaches, the Mage takes his eyes off me and moves towards Snow. I make to move towards him as well, but find that I can’t move. 

He must have spelled me- so I shout- and no noise comes out. What is happening? I need to get Simon away from him. He keeps moving forward, almost as if not in his own control. I feel frantic as I watch what happens in front of me. 

“Oh, Simon.” The Mage says fake concern plastered all over his face. “You’ve had to experience more pain than I would want for you too.” He rubs his hand up and down Simon’s arms, meaning to comfort him. I can tell it’s all a facade- but why? What is his endgame? I’ve always known the Mage to be awful, but this is a new low. What could hurting Simon do to help him?

“I can’t do this,” Simon whispers. “I’m just hurting people. I never asked for all this magic- I don’t want it. I’m not good at it anyway.” His knees start shaking. I look to the Mage and see a sick smile on his face before he goes back to a face filled with pity and fake concern. 

“We can fix that too- if you want Simon.”

Simon finally looks up at that. “Really?” 

“Yes. I can wake you up and I can take your magic. It has to be done willingly though Simon. I cannot force you, but I also cannot give it back to you. It is a one-time transaction.”

The absolute  _ fucker _ . This was his plan all along wasn’t it? He wanted to break Simon down. To make him feel like he needed to give up his magic in order to save those around him. Simon Snow is such a bloody hero that he would do it, of course. If I could move I would tear his throat out right where he stood. 

I’m screaming at Simon, knowing full well that he won’t be able to hear me. The Mage can see me and he gives me a smirk before turning back to Simon again. For a moment I see Snow’s shoulders turn as if he is going to look back at me- but the Mage is too quick and grabs him and makes him look at him. 

  
“Yes. Okay- yes.” Simon says faintly. “Please- I can’t hurt anyone.”

The Mage then brushes a curl from his forehead and gives a small smile. 

“Okay, Simon. Then I will break the spell. Meet me in my office and this can all be over.” 

It’s then that everything goes dark again and when I open my eyes I see our room’s ceiling, and I hear something creak. My bed- Simon!

“Simon- No!” I shout standing up and getting in front of him. 

“Please, Baz.” He says, voice coming out small and weak. I reach out and cup his cheek with my hand, wiping away a tear with my thumb. 

“Simon, please,” I say again, stepping closer and putting my other hand so his face is cupped between both of my hands. I need him to look at me and understand that he would not- _ could not _ \- hurt anything. “He made all of that up. You’ve never hurt anyone. Even when you aren’t in control of your magic you still manage to protect everyone around you. This is a ploy of his to get your magic- you have to see it.” I look at him, hoping he can see the pleading in my eyes. 

He stares up at me for so long before his eyes drop again. “I’m so tired Baz.” He sounds it as well. “I’m not sure what is real and what isn’t anymore. I’m not even sure that this is-” And I cut him off by kissing him. I need him to know that this is real, so this may seem drastic but I need him to understand, to  _ get it _ . 

It takes a moment, and I’m worried that my dramatic move was too much, but he starts to kiss me back and pull me closer- as if it is  _ me _ that might run away from this kiss. 

I could never. 

**Simon**

After everything I saw, I wasn’t sure the Baz standing in front of me was real or not. Everything  _ feels _ different here. The edges of my vision aren’t blurry like they were when I was dreaming, but this kiss definitely feels like it could be a dream. In what world would  _ Baz Pitch _ be kissing me? 

And in what world would I be kissing back? I can’t help it though. His lips feel soft and cold (but, like, in a good way?) against mine. It’s almost like I can find all the answers to the universe in his lips- and I never want it to end. This is definitely new for us. 

He pulls away, breathing heavily, and looking at me as if I should have something figured out. I must not react in the way he hopes, because he sighs and begins to talk. 

“Please, Snow-” He starts

“You called me Simon before.” I’m not sure why that is what I decide to fight on, but apparently, it is important to me at this moment. I swear my head must not be screwed on right. 

He huffs a laugh at that. “Yes, I guess I did.” I smile at his admittance. “But I need you to hear me. You cannot give him your magic. Please, even if you are worried about your magic being uncontrollable I can help you, Bunce can help you. Hell anyone else, please.” He is begging, I never thought I’d see Baz beg me to do anything (except maybe to close the window.)

I don’t quite believe him. If there was any way for me to control my magic I would have found it by now. The Mage would have done it a long time ago, and maybe life would be a bit easier. My past has shown me that I can’t control it. There have been countless incidents of explosions during class, in the wood, or even during meals. I reach out and grab Baz’s hand, and hope that he can help me through whatever happens next. 

I’m not sure at what point I started to trust Baz. Whether it was when he held me as I cried in my dream, how he apparently ran into my dream to help me, or when he kissed me. All I know is that I can’t go back to enemies. I don’t want to hurt him, but I would like to kiss him again. Looking into his grey eyes I see concern mostly, but also a softness that I don’t get to see often from him. As I lean in close his eyes flutter closed and I can’t help but smile at the loveliness of it all. 

It’s just as good as the first time, better even since I expect it. I bring my hand to his face, pushing his soft hair behind his ear. Never did I think  _ this _ was a possibility, but now that it is I don’t ever want to lose it. 

It’s at this that I hear the door fly open, and we separate, looking at the person who burst in. 

**Baz**

Of course, the fucking Mage would walk in right now. He looks red with frustration but tries to look like he is worried, walking up to Simon. I immediately draw my wand and step in front of him. He will  _ not _ be spelling me silent and still as he did in Simon’s dream. 

He looks taken aback at me, but peers over my shoulder to look at Simon. He coughs once before talking. 

“I was worried that something had happened.” He starts, looking between us as he talks. “You seemed so sure of your decision before. I decided that maybe you were too upset and that it’d be best if I came to you. “

He pauses, obviously waiting for a response. When he doesn’t get one he turns to me. 

“Basilton, you may leave. This is a private matter between Simon and me.” He glares at me, trying to scare me. 

Unlucky for him- you cannot scare a Pitch quite so easily. 

“I think I am right where I need to be,” I say, smirking and stepping forward, more in the way between him and Simon. This obviously angers him, and he looks like he is going to attack. 

“ **Stand your ground** ” I cast, pointing at his feet, then pointing my wand to his face and cast **mums the word** and cast his wand away from him. I am trying to cover all my bases as we figure out what to do next. 

That seems to give Snow a bit more confidence. 

“I’ve changed my mind, sir.” He says, stepping beside me and grabbing my hand. I squeeze it in comfort before he continues. 

“You tried your best, but it is clear that this was all something to just try to take my magic. I’ll be honest, it almost worked, but unfortunately for you, I’ve got people who care about me and can remind me of the truth.” He looks at me as he says that, and my heart warms. “I don’t hurt people. While I may not be the greatest at controlling my magic, I am sure I can handle it all better than you could.” 

He looks at me again. “What do we do now?” 

I think about that. “I could rip his throat out right here and be done with it?”

That only makes him laugh a bit- but I see the Mage’s eyes grow wide, and knowing he is afraid of me now makes me happy. Snow decides, ever the hero, that the coven should be contacted and the Mage should be served his justice the lawful way. Snow makes several comments about how he doesn’t want me to be a murderer, but I can’t help think it might be justified with a person like him. 

***

It doesn’t take long for the coven to arrive, Mitali Bunce leading the pack. They ask a few questions and take the Mage away. As soon as all the people leave Simon crashes down on his bed. 

“I know that I was asleep the whole time, but I have never felt more exhausted in my life.” He says, his eyelids already starting to droop closed. 

I walk to my own bed, sitting on it and facing him. He looks like he is about to fall asleep any second now, and I don’t want to disturb him. 

**Simon**

I want Baz to sleep with me in my bed. It makes no sense, but I’d feel safer having him near. I feel my eyes droop closed, and then snap back open and I get a sense of panic at falling asleep. 

“Baz,” I say, looking over towards him- hoping he hasn’t fallen asleep yet. I’m lucky- he is looking at me from his own bed, and at the sound of his name, he quickly comes to me. 

“Yes?” He says, searching my eyes for an answer. 

“Do you- do you think?” I start and take a deep breath before continuing. “Could you sleep in my bed tonight? I’d feel safer if you did.”

“Of course” He smiles at me before climbing in bed, allowing me to wrap my arms around him and lay my head on his chest. I can hear his barely-there heartbeat, and feel the rising and falling of his chest as he breathes. His fingers raking through my wild curls helps calm me down. 

“I like this better than fighting,” I say softly.

He takes a bit to respond, but eventually, he says “I like this better than fighting too Snow. Now get some sleep- I’m right here for you.”

I move closer to him and clutch him tightly, feeling as though the closer he is the farther away everything bad is. Thoughts about how I’ll defeat the humdrum, what the Mage being removed from Watford will mean, what I’ll tell Penny in the morning, and more invade my head. I try to push them to the side and focus on Baz. 

Whatever happens, we have each other moving forward. There’s no going back to how it was before, and this is so much better than anything else I could have imagined. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks so much for reading! Feel free to check me out on tumblr: caitybuglove23


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